Wicked Power Page 15

  As we walk, I tell Ketchup about my experience with Emma and he agrees that I should keep what I can do secret. He pulls me to a stop next to a stand of baby aspen trees, pointing down the path to where he just spotted Zander. We both stare openmouthed.

  “Is Zander laughing?” Ketchup asks.

  I can hardly blame him for the disbelief in his voice. I try to remember the last time I saw Zander standing with anyone, let alone a beautiful redhead, talking and laughing like it was the most normal thing in the world. I mean, it would be totally normal, if it weren’t Zander. This is just…creepy.

  We don’t approach Zander right away. Instead, we both watch him interact with the redhead until they split apart with a friendly wave. When my brother starts heading somewhere new, I take a step forward, knowing Ketchup will wait for me here. I manage three steps before my skin prickles, as if an icy wind has just blown straight through me. It lurches me to a stop.

  The panic comes next. No matter how many breaths I take, it isn’t enough. I gasp for air as my vision darkens. One hand reaches out for…for something. I can’t focus enough to know what I need, and that only scares me even more. I fear I am about to faint, but arms wrap around me before I drop. The heat of Ketchup’s skin burns me, reigniting the panic.

  “Let go,” I beg, “you’re burning me!”

  “It’s not me,” Ketchup says. “You’re ice cold!”

  Somehow, Ketchup drags me over to a bench and shoves me down onto it. I try to look up at him, but I can’t stop the fluttering of my eyelids long enough to really see him. Suddenly, the woodland compound vanishes and flashes of Zander locked in a brutal fight with some guy I’ve never seen before blur past me in a nearly indecipherable haze. I can hear Ketchup saying something to me, but I don’t even try to respond. All I can do is watch the awful images speed by.

  As if I have just been pulled from beneath icy water, I gasp in a mammoth breath and start shaking terribly. Ketchup is all but strangling me with his arms as he holds me at this point, but I don’t try to get away. His warmth that burned me only a few seconds ago now feels welcome and comforting. I burrow against him and breathe.

  “Van, what on earth just happened?” Ketchup demands.

  I can’t make myself pull away from him. My voice is muffled as I say, “I… I saw something again.”

  “Saw something?” Ketchup pushes my chin up gently. The confusion in his expression begs for a better answer.

  “Like what happened at school…the battle scene, remember?”

  Ketchup leans back and scrubs his hand through his hair. He takes a deep breath. “What did you see?”

  My face scrunches as I try to piece together the images. “Zander fighting this really scary-looking guy, but it wasn’t like he was being attacked. They were in a cage.”

  “What?”

  I shrug. “It had walls with fencing around it, and it was kind of circular, but it had angles. The floor was like a boxing ring.”

  It startles me when Ketchup laughs. He pulls out his phone and taps a few things before turning it toward me. “Did it look like that?”

  “Yes!” I say excitedly. “What is that?”

  “An MMA octagon.” Ketchup drags both hands down his face. “You saw him fighting in a mixed martial arts octagon. That’s all. More of David’s training, I’m sure.”

  A certain amount of relief does come, but Zander’s opponent still has me uneasy. “The guy he was fighting, it didn’t look like they were training. It was more like they were trying to kill each other.”

  “What looks like two people trying to kill each other may be nothing when it’s two Godlings going up against one another,” Ketchup says. “Watching you and Zander fight is pretty intense, and you’re not even trying to hurt each other.”

  I nod, but I’m not convinced. Leaning against Ketchup, I take a deep breath.

  “So, is this going to start happening all the time, or what?” Ketchup asks as he pulls me against him. “I don’t know if I can handle that too many more times without some warning.”

  “Sorry. I’ll try not to spaz out on you again without giving you a heads up… if I can.”

  Ketchup chuckles. “It’s okay. It just freaked me out a little, but hey, at least you didn’t faint this time.”

  “True,” I laugh. “That’s progress, I guess.”

  I lean against Ketchup’s shoulder. His fingers trail through my hair, shaking as they go. My breathing hitches as I realize just how much I scared him. I want to tell him that it’s nothing to worry about, that I’m fine, but these weird experiences don’t end when the flashes do. The hum of certainty that what I’ve seen isn’t anything good refuses to be shaken off. Despite Ketchup’s reassurances, Zander fighting in that octagon won’t be just a training session. It will be the beginning of something truly frightening.

  Chapter Thirteen: A Way Out

  (Zander)

  “How was your training this morning?” Annabelle asks.

  She opens the door of the library and holds it for me. The corner of my mouth turns up. My general mistrust of everyone associated with the Godlings hasn’t gone away, but Annabelle makes it hard not to be at least friendly. I like how she never waits for me to do things for her. It’s like it doesn’t even occur to her that I might want to be polite and open the door for her. She got there first, so she opened the door.

  I walk past her and finally answer her question. “It was interesting. David had me in the gym training with some of the Godlings my age. He hasn’t said anything about me going up against James, but it seems pretty clear that he intends to pit us against each other soon.”

  “What makes you say that?” Annabelle asks.

  “His focus is rather one-sided.” I gesture at an empty table, and we both sit down. “He has me training with a healer later this afternoon, so I’ll be able to keep myself going during a fight. Everything he wants me to learn is geared toward battle and controlling my hunger. When I try to ask him about the Eroi or anything about the book, he always has something more pressing he needs to talk about.”

  Annabelle sighs. “Well, then I guess it’s up to me to fill in the missing pieces.”

  I smile at Annabelle, even though the thought is always in the back of my mind that she is only following David’s orders. I don’t really understand why she’s interested in helping me if it doesn’t have to do with him, but I appreciate the help all the same. The fact that she is one of the easiest people to be around that I’ve ever met is nice, too. It’s different, not something I’ve ever had before. There is something about her that is calming. I’ve missed feeling at peace in my life so much that being near her is almost addictive. I know I shouldn’t trust it, especially after whatever she did that first day we met. Logic is begging me to distance myself from her, but it’s surprisingly hard.

  “So, what do you want to start with?” Annabelle asks.

  I mull that question over for a moment. “How did this whole Eroi hunting the Godlings war start?”

  “So,” Annabelle says with a laugh, “the beginning?”

  “Seems like the logical choice.”

  Annabelle chuckles and excuses herself to go find the right books. I wait patiently, which isn’t something I’ve been very good at lately. It’s easier with Annabelle because I know she’ll come through for me. She returns a few minutes later with a small stack of books.

  Annabelle sets a book down so it’s in front of me, and then comes and sits down next to me. Crowding in close, she leans toward me as if we are about to share secrets. I back up instinctively, but Annabelle doesn’t seem to notice.

  “Okay, so the idea of the compound was born about three hundred years ago in Italy by Roberto Agosti and Giovanni De Palma. At the time, they were leading a small group of Godlings in Turin, trying to help each other avoid the church and the police.”

  “The church?” I ask.

  Annabelle nods. “The church thought Godlings were demons. They pretty much killed anyone the
y even suspected of being a Godling. The Eroi didn’t come from the church, but their hatred and fear of the Godlings brought together likeminded people who vowed to hunt down all the demons. The church was more than willing to support them. Eventually, they became a sort of brotherhood.”

  “Oh.” I really hadn’t even considered what being a Godling might have meant throughout the centuries. I thought it was hard dealing with hunger in today’s world, but it must have been a whole other experience when the general populace actually believed in things like demons, and it was legal to execute someone on suspicion alone. Add in having people band together to find and kill you, and that makes for a pretty scary period in history.

  “Anyway,” Annabelle continues, “the first group of Godlings weren’t very successful. In the first year after banding together, more than half of them had either left the group or been captured and killed. Everyone had their own ideas about how Godlings should live, what their rights were as demigods, and whether or not they should even try to hide. Some believed they were meant to rule the humans.”

  I hold my hands up and stop Annabelle. Maybe all of this is basic information to her, but I am scrambling from one idea to the next while trying to take it all in. “Rights as demigods? Rule the humans?” I shake my head. “What you’re saying sounds like Godlings used to believe they were actually mythical creatures.”

  Annabelle looks down at the table. Her fingers twist together anxiously. Getting the hint, I lower my head into my hands and sigh. “You still believe that, don’t you?”

  “Uh, yeah.”

  That’s what I thought she was going to say. Sitting up, I fold my arms over my chest. I want to hear what she knows, but I’m not sure I can just accept everything she believes. We’ve never been a religious family. I know little about any form of god. Believing that I am linked to one so intimately is too much to take.

  “If you think about it,” Annabelle says, “if a person like us had no idea who or what they are, wouldn’t they assume one of two things? Either they were created by a god or powerful being for a specific purpose, or they were cursed by that same being as punishment for some wrong committed. Either way, someone bigger than us is responsible for what we are.”

  My jaw clenches in response to her words. My head shakes back and forth slowly. “That person you just described, the one asking the questions? That was me. That is exactly how my siblings and I grew up, with no knowledge of what we were or why we’re like this. What god was responsible was the last question on my mind.”

  The confusion in Annabelle’s eyes shows her naiveté. “Then, what did you think?”

  “I thought we were a mistake,” I snap. “An anomaly, some accident of nature, a screwed up piece of genetic code centuries of reproduction couldn’t manage to weed out.”

  I jump when Annabelle’s hand touches mine gently. She pauses a moment, but slowly wraps her fingers around mine. “Zander, you’re not a mistake. Whether you believe a god created Godlings or our hunger is a product of some kind of evolution, it doesn’t change the fact that you are an amazing being with incredible power. It’s no accident that you were put here on this earth at exactly this moment.”

  “Do you really believe that?” I ask skeptically. “How can you when all we do is feed on negativity and crave the destruction of others? What god would create something so vile?”

  I shove the book away from me angrily. “Who says the Eroi aren’t right to be hunting us down?”

  Annabelle snatches her hand away, looking stricken. “How can you say that?”

  “We’re killers, Annabelle. That is what we were made for. It doesn’t matter who made us, or what. We feed on pain, we cause suffering, and we ruin people’s lives! David wants to teach everyone control, but aren’t we just fighting what we were designed to be? Why didn’t Roberto and Giovanni get together three hundred years ago and simply decide to stop reproducing, be the last of this godforsaken race?”

  The silence that fills our corner of the library is heavy and thick. It suffocates me as I stare at Annabelle’s bowed head. Part of me says I should take everything back, but I can’t. I won’t.

  “I’m not a killer,” Annabelle says quietly. She peers up, looking at me with glassy eyes.

  The anger and fight drains out of me in an instant. “Annabelle, I’m sorry.”

  She shakes her head. “I’m not upset because of what you said. I know it wasn’t directed at me personally.”

  “Then what?” I ask.

  “You question everything I’ve been taught because you’ve been left alone with this so long. How could you hope to manage it by yourself with no one to guide you?” Annabelle wipes away a tear that has slipped past her control. “Zander, I don’t have all the answers. Maybe we were created as a cruel joke. Maybe the Eroi are right to want to rid the world of us. I don’t know. What I do know is that Roberto and Giovanni wanted more for us than lives lived in the shadows full of fear. I don’t know what the purpose is behind our hunger, but I do know that it doesn’t have to be used to hurt people.”

  Too quickly for me to respond, Annabelle presses her palm to my chest. The warm glow that bursts out from her palm is a shock to my system. I gasp and shove her hand away from me. Annabelle clutches her hand to her chest, and I slump back in my chair. She’s hurt that I pushed her away, but that light terrifies me for reasons I’m not sure I even understand.

  “Maybe most of what we are is bad,” Annabelle says quietly, “but not all. I know what I do freaks you out, but it’s not something to be scared of. I wouldn’t have this gift if there wasn’t at least some good behind our purpose.”

  Shaken by the absolute faith in her voice, I sit back and meet Annabelle’s gaze. To my surprise, she smiles at me. I reach forward, almost touching her, but I pull back at the last second. “I’m sorry for what I said. My mistakes are my own. I want to believe what you say, that’s there was something good behind our design. I can believe it about you.”

  “But not of yourself?”

  I shake my head. “You said you felt what I carry around inside of me. Did you see any goodness or light in there?”

  Annabelle looks at me in a way no one has ever looked at me before, as if she truly sees what I am made of. Her voice is gentle as she says, “You can shut your light away behind all the darkness and pain, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there. You just have to give it a way out.”

  “I don’t know how to do that,” I admit.

  Annabelle smiles. “Who says you have to figure it out on your own?”

  I don’t think I realized until that moment how alone I have felt. Not just since Ivy betrayed me. Not just since Mom and Dad died. I can’t pinpoint a time when I truly trusted someone else. As much as I loved my parents, deep down, we all knew they were keeping a great many secrets from us. Grandma was no different. Oscar was always so solitary and unstable, and I couldn’t burden Van with my problems because I was supposed to be her support. Annabelle isn’t touching me and there’s no sign of her light, but just being near her bleeds away a layer of my pain. I know I shouldn’t trust her, but it’s getting harder not to.

  “Thank you,” I say quietly.

  The corner of Annabelle’s mouth turns up. Her lips part, but before she can say anything, the vibration of my phone rattling against the table makes us both jump. I snatch up the phone and answer with a quick hello.

  A voice I know all too well whispers across the line and sets my hair on end. “They killed my family because of you.”

  Chapter Fourteen: Eating Up The Agony

  (Zander)

  Getting any sleep last night after that phone call was a fantasy. I haven’t been able to think of anything else since hearing Ivy’s voice yesterday. I storm into the gym where David is expecting to meet me, a workout the last thing on my mind. Spotting him near the octagon, I fix my glare on him and refuse to be distracted by anything else. He sees me approaching and folds his arms across his chest to wait.

  “What
happens to Richiamos when they fail?” I demand. The tone and volume of my voice causes several heads to turn in my direction. I don’t care.

  David seems unfazed by my question and abrasive manner, yet he gestures toward the gym manager’s office. He doesn’t wait for me to respond. I am forced to either follow him or stay standing here like an idiot. As usual, David gets what he wants.

  As soon as I clear the doorframe, David slams the door shut and rounds on me. “Did I instruct you to meet me here this morning in order for the whole compound to watch you throw a tantrum about what may or may not have happened to your ex-girlfriend or her family?”

  “Then it’s true? They killed her family because she failed?” I demand.

  David grabs me by the shirtfront and slams me into the wall. “It was your family or hers! She knew that before she went after you. It was obviously a risk she was willing to take. Get over it!”

  “She never expected to fail!” I yell. “She was supposed to die, not them!”

  Disgusted, David shoves me away from him. “Are you seriously asking me to feel sympathy for that girl? She set out to destroy you and your family. There was no remorse when she pushed you over the edge and sealed your fate. She wanted to see you dead, Zander! She wanted it more than anything, and yet here you are still obsessing over her, like her life or death actually matters! You’re pathetic!”

  Fury like I have never known wells up inside of me, but I don’t know what I am more irate about, him calling me pathetic, or him being right.

  “You seem to think that because we both experienced the intoxication of a Richiamos that we’re somehow connected, that we’re pals. You want to hear my story and bond like little girls at a sleepover? Do you?” David locks eyes with mine, and I can feel the hatred radiating off his body in waves.